Life's Lessons

I have seen these before, but I enjoyed reading them again. So, I’m posting them here today.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save them for a special occasion – today is special.
22. Over-prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important body organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read some good books. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

FAITH and other abstract nouns...

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! (Goethe's Faust)

Faith can move mountains. Faith precedes the miracle. Faith without works is dead. And so on ...but I believe that we can find FAITH everywhere that living, breathing life exists. The salmon struggles to survive an arduous uphill climb to spawn, with an unspoken faith that the necessary journey will be fruitful. My beautiful dog Molly has faith that I will return her affection when she wraps her neck around my own and waits to be embraced. And I have faith that this world, which seems to be spinning out of control amidst chaos and unbelief, is doing exactly as God intended from its creation until this day.

Every breath my friend takes these days brings her one breath closer to her last. And she seems to be very afraid of what lies ahead for her. If I could give her one word of comfort it would be to have FAITH. "Look ever forward. In last year's nests there are no eggs." She will pass over to the other side, where she'll be met by those who loved her most in this lifetime. Among those waiting for her is Christ Jesus, her creator. She will sit at his feet and continue to learn of him, the Master who will be her final judge. In this I have faith.

In his autobiography, Scottish writer W.H. Murray wrote:
"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back…Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, the Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way." -- (The Evidence of Things Not Seen)

It takes faith to dream. Faith is the first principle in Christian belief, followed closely by repentance and baptism. So, when you find your faith, exercise it. Your dreams will come true.

The Happiest People...

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything. You are the miracle, my friend. Your life either shines a light – or casts a shadow. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

M&Ms: Survival of the Fittest!

I received this story as an email and enjoyed it enough to share on my blog, which is generally reserved for my heart of hearts. I make an exception for this story...

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes." This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
There can be only one.

"FLDS" -- What the BLEEP?! (Part I)

In an effort to save money on groceries, I went shopping for coupons online this week. Imagine my surprise when one coupon link took me to an FLDS web site that included patterns & photographs for women who wish to make goofy-looking polygamist clothing. My surprise was quickly replaced by righteous indignation. My disgust with the Eldorado Polygamist sect runs so deep that I've decided to use this forum (my Blog) to say my piece. With the FLDS cult headlining national news, on the heals of cult leader Warren Jeffs trial and conviction, I find these people to be freakishly unhinged emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.

• Mental illness prevails among these people, as a result of multi-generational "in-breeding." One could chuckle at the idea of such an anomaly; however, the truth of this matter induces disgust.
• Women breeding daughters and sons to perpetuate this sick lifestyle should be sterilized, especially in light of the ages at which their daughters are forced to marry (12, 13, 14...). Once sorted out, Texas DFS workers reported at least one 16 year old girl with four children. You do the math: she was impregnated before she turned 13.
• These dilusional folks are liars. They lie to their children, to their neighbors, to the authorities, and ultimately they lie to and about God in Heaven. God will not command his people to break the law of the land; neither will he cause children to be harmed. The claims of these polygamist extremists are lies; specifically, they lie when they say God has commanded them to live the way they do. Some lecherous old Warren-Jeffs-type-guy commands and like goats, they follow to the left side of the Master (New Testament allegory).
• It is a monumental understatement to say that the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saint Church is an "offshoot" of the Mormon Church. These FLDS individuals are grossly misguided in their interpretation of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I cringe everytime I think of my dear friends and family who wonder if I'm associated with anything remotely related to FLDS. That would be a resounding NO.

The coupon URL included an article on how to use coupons with WIC. What the hell???? Not only are these folks breaking the law, sexually enslaving adolescent girls, and denying women access to birth control, they are bilking the federal government's WIC program. I'm outraged to think that my tax dollars are providing free food for the women, infants and children of polygamists who are having babies faster than they can think up bogus names for investigators!

I'll add more to this article later. In fact, I may just add a Part II in response to new developments at "the compound" in Eldorado, Texas. In the meantime, promise me - Dear Reader - you will not allow yourself or others to confuse FLDS followers with Mormons (LDS), members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Promise? I've been a faithful Momon since 1969, and as such I've

• never known any Mormon to practice polygamy
• never been discouraged from using birth control
• never witnessed the marriage of underage adolescent girls (or boys)
• never worn freakish pioneer costuming
• never heard of anyone engaging in sex in a temple of the Lord
• never lied to or about God or Jesus Christ

There. That's all for now...Stay tuned for the 2008 Spring Plig Fashion Show in my next blog.